40 Days – #37

I haven’t had another MRI to attempt to measure the results of my treatment. I don’t feel any better now than I did before I started taking the Avonex. I have been questioning whether or not I made the right choice to use Avonex and to keep using Avonex. How do you know if you are doing the right thing. How can I be sure that it is working and that it is truly helping to slow the progression of my MS?

I have recently started to add meditation to my Yoga practice. I bought a set of Japa Mala beads. If you have never heard of these beads, you should google them. They are really cool. I read about them in a book recently and knew I had to have them. They are similar to a rosary in that you meditate (pray) with them. It is believed that you can empower the Mala with a mantra if you practice for forty days. You repeat a mantra as you count the beads and after forty days of dedicated practice the mantra holds your intention. At that point you can wear the beads that hold the energy of your intention.

I researched different mantras online and found a very powerful healing mantra and asked my Yoga Teacher to teach me how to say it. I plan to spend the forty days of lent meditating and praying with these beads. I want to have an opportunity to tie in the meditation and Indian belief with my own Christian beliefs.

This research is where I realized that the Avonex was working. With one of the healing mantras that I found it came with advice in approaching the first forty days. “The reason for taking things easy for the first forty day commitment is due to the cumulative action of the mantra. For the first few days, all will probably go smoothly. Then as you progress, you may find that things start to get in the way of your doing the discipline: You oversleep, there is some minor emergency, you get a cold, (you forget to order your AVONEX!), whatever. This means that you are beginning to effect the inner “something” for which you undertook the mantra. You are beginning to encounter inner resistance. That inner resistance manifests as outer obstacles to your discipline. There is no better indication that your efforts are working than to have small upheavals in your life while you are in the midst of a forty day mantra discipline (or an ongoing course of disease modification drugs).

After reading this I see that my external interruption and missing this weeks dose of Avonex is based on inner resistance. I am beginning to effect the inner “something”.

Maybe you totally get this or perhaps you think I am completely off my rocker but it makes total sense to me. And, just in case you are worried, I know cognitive problems arise with MS but I don’t think this is one of those times!

If you are interested in wearing your own healing beads, I ordered mine from yogabasics.com. The mantra I found goes like this:

“Om Apadamapa Hataram Dataram Sarva Sampadam Loka Bhi Raman Sri Rama Bhuyo Bhuyo Namamyaham. It means “Om, Oh most compassionate Rama please send your healing energy right here to the earth, to the earth.”

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3 responses to “40 Days – #37

  1. “I plan to spend the forty days of lent meditating and praying with these beads.”

    I suppose you are going to fast too. If so, make sure to keep your nutritional requirements in mind.

  2. I do not plan to fast. I want to do things that keep my energy level up.

  3. i love your idea of praying and meditating with the beads during lent!

    i’m glad you feel its been worthwhile to take the avonex. i’m not sure i completely follow how you realized it’s working but i do think that if it makes sense to you, then you are probably right about it. you are the one who’d know.

    are you going to post the paper on stem cells? i’d like to read it. i think you handled that situation really well.

    -jen

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